Before L. Ron Hubbard chose to discard his corporeal flesh vessel in order to pursue his research on a higher plane, his many teachings were recorded in, among other mediums, the world's most incomprehensible comic book.
Here are some absolutely bananas excerpts from his 871-page Scientology Handbook:
After driving away the anti-woke crowd with his holiday gala meltdown, Schneider will try to win them back with some old-fashioned Christian entertainment