Cyriaque Lamar
Cyriaque Lamar was Managing Editor of Cracked. He was previously Senior Editor of the Gawker Media science fiction site io9 and Nottingham High School Prom King 2002.
Hey Everybody, Cracked's Mascot Is Back
Wait a minute, Cracked has a mascot?
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
A First Look At Unsanctioned, Magic: The Gathering's New Set
Squirrels, goblins, and chickens, oh my!
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
12 Shockingly Important Near-Misses Of Marvel Movie History
Fun fact: Captain America's cinematic civil war almost pitted Tom Cruise against Dane Cook.
- Authors
- By Alex Schmidt, Joey Clift, Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
7 Common Mistakes That Ruin Movie Sequels & Trilogies
Here's how Adventure Number Three forgets what made Numbers One and Two worth watching.
- Authors
- By Alex Schmidt, Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
10 Photos Of Spider-Man With Steve Buscemi's Eyes
This makes more sense than you know.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar, Logan Trent
- Published
12 Pop Culture Franchises That Went Insanely Off The Rails
Everything from 'Garfield' to 'Casablanca' has sequels, prequels, re-imaginings and more stuff you never wanted.
- Authors
- By Alex Schmidt, Cyriaque Lamar, Kristi Harrison
- Published
21 Comic Books That Turned Insane Out Of The Blue
Captain America: he's today's Hollywood icon, and yesterday's cartoon werewolf.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar, Alex Schmidt
- Published
23 Awesome Beginnings To Start Your New Year Right
Happy 2018 to you, The Entire Planet.
- Authors
- By Kristi Harrison, Alex Schmidt, Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
Dear Obama And Trump, Please Heal America (And Make Out)
For the sake of this country, Trump and Obama must have a forbidden tryst over the next two months.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
4 Steps to Being the Very Worst in a World of Shitty DJs
Step #1: Suck. Step #2: Forget you suck. Step #3: Remember you suck in front of 100 people.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
If Every Single 'Star Wars: Episode 7' Rumor Was True
If you Frankenstein-knit together all of the Episode VII rumors -- regardless of veracity -- you end up with THE MOST EXCITING STAR WARS TO STAR WAR IN THE STARS.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
4 Ways Archie Comics Have Gone F***ing Crazy
Archie comics are as inoffensive and uncontroversial as possible -- well, most of the time.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
4 Reasons 'Falconman' Is The Craziest Superhero Movie Ever
Are you sick of the same tired-ass superhero movies? Then be thankful Jean-Claude Van Damme has your back.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
4 Anti-Drug Songs That Are Baffling (Even For the '80s)
There's a lot of propaganda out there about not putting angel dust or airplane glue or thumbtacks in your face holes, and most of it is terrible.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
15 Reasons You Should Have Hit Me With Your Car
I realized that I was a selfish jerk for not allowing this particular car to mow me down, and I owe the human race an apology.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
5 Dangers You Find in the Homes of the Elderly
That house made me understand why H.P. Lovecraft wrote up New England as the edge of sanity but with shittier winters.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
4 Steps To Make Sure 'Batman vs. Superman' Isn't Terrible
DC Comics already laid out the easiest template ever for a 'Batman vs. Superman' movie back in 1986. Let's break it down step by step.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
5 Reasons 2013 Was Actually 1996 All Over Again
This year was not the year you thought it was. So if you wrongly believe what year it currently is, this will be the most important thing you will read all year. Year year year.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
Direct 'The Avengers 2' in 10 Minutes or Your Family Is Dead
WARNING: The scene you are about to witness is a chilling preview of humanity’s future, but not humanity’s far future. Maybe two haircuts from now. And if you’re bald, you will grow a lustrous mane minutes after reading this article. Your scalp will soon sport some real 'Yanni Live at the Acropolis' shit.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
3 Dumb Monsters Who Deserve Their Own 'Twilight' Spinoff
You're shitting the bed, Hollywood.
- Authors
- By Cyriaque Lamar
- Published
